January 22nd is National Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day!
Cats are complex creatures. Some of their actions may indicate they are nihilists (“I can knock this vase off your night stand and watch it shatter because morality is a false construct”). Others suggest they take pleasure in withholding, like when they walk over to be pet, bite you, and walk away.
Cats’ bizarre behaviors only make us wonder even more: what could they possibly be thinking about?
Well, they probably wonder about some of our strange behaviors, too. That’s why National Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day is so much fun! We get to think about what questions our cats would ask us, then answer those questions for our kitties’ benefit.
Do they understand our answers? Who knows? It’s just for fun! Here are ten things our cats would probably ask us if they could on National Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day.
1. Why Do You Yell At Me For Scratching The Large, Soft Scratching Posts In The House?
Scratching is 100 percent normal for cats; expensive, imported Scandinavian furniture is not.
To cats, your new love seat is a very large, intricate scratching post to help keep their claws from getting too long or to stave off boredom. Scratching is also used as a stress reliever for cats.
Your cat probably has questions about your stress reducing habits, like that bottle of red stuff you sip while looking at a glowing box.
2. Why Do You Take A Hundred Photos Of Me Daily?
You’re cute, cat. Deal with it.
To keep your cat from dodging your Instagram photo-capturing tactics altogether, opt out of using a flash. And be sure to get pics of them them at their best–nobody wants to see a photo of your cat looking miserable or in distress like when their claw gets caught on something.
3. Why Do You Bring Strangers To My Home?
I always have to hide because they want to pet me and *shudders* pick me up.
After all, your cat doesn’t invite a bunch of their friends over and expect you to be completely chill with it.
4. Can’t I Go Outside For Just A Little Bit?
You should have just named me Rapunzel.
Just like human children, your cat may not understand when you’re making a decision that seems to suck, but in reality is in their best interest.
If your indoor cat looks like they’re pining for the great outdoors, consider getting them a window perch or a nice cat tree near a window so they can get a glimpse of the other world.
If you have an outdoor cat, be sure they have free access to get back inside your home.
5. Why Do You Take Away My Personalized Heating Pad?
I like laying on it and don’t get why you’re frustrated.
In the cat world, laptops and other electronics are heating pads, not communication or work tools for their humans. We take it away because we need it to work so we can continue to feed our kitties and buy them all of the catnip they deserve.
If your cat keeps climbing on or laying on things that they’re not allowed to, consider some training to break the habit.
6. Why Do You Keep Petting Me When I Want You To Stop?
Don’t you see my tail flicking about and feel me trying to squirm away?
While we always want to give our cats plenty of love and affection, force-petting or holding your cat is not the way for them to understand your love for them.
Be sure to train yourself in cat body language so you can tell when they enjoying being pet or brushed–and when to back off.
7. Why Do You Freak Out If You Can’t Find Me?
Sometimes I just need my space!
Cats are crafty and will find a way to hide in the least expected of places, such as a large pot underneath your sink or in the lining of a futon. If they’re scared or unsure of their environment, cats will hide.
As long as you’re positive they haven’t found a way outside, there’s no need to panic. Let your kitty hide in peace until they feel comfortable enough to come out.
8. What’s That Loud Demon Machine You Run Across The Floor?
Vacuums, while terrifying to you, dear kitty, are a necessity to any cat owner.
Fortunately, there are ways for us to help keep kitty’s fur from going everywhere, like feeding a nutrient-rich food to keep their coat silky and brushing regularly to keep shedding to a minimum.
To keep your cat from freaking out too badly while cleaning, give them a safe space from the vacuum, like a cat tree.
9. What’s With The Brushing? I Can Groom Myself!
We know you can groom yourself, kitty. But we don’t want to live in a fur covered environment, much like you don’t like using the litter box when it is too dirty.
We take care of that, too.
10. Why Are You Obsessed With My Poop?
Seriously, you scoop it out daily and put it in a little bag.
Some things, like your mysterious poop obsession, will forever remain a mystery to your cat, no matter how many times you try to explain it.
Jokes aside, it is important to educate yourself on the way your cat can actually communicate to you via body language, little chirps, and meows. Even if you can’t answer some of your cat’s questions directly, you can still do a pretty good job of listening to what they have to say.
Maybe that will help you come up with answers your cat can understand on National Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day.
Is there something your cat is dying to know the answer to on National Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day? Let us know in the comments below!